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Confederates: 0.
So I don't have a whole lot of time to write since I'm exhausted, but I want to take advantage of the free wifi here and post some pics of our day. :)
Me and the J-Ster at the battle.... :) SO CUTE, aren't we?
I love this. I love it in sepia tone too. :)
DUDE. THIS IS THE FACE OF THE CIVIL WAR. RIGHT HERE.
I got a GUN!
Custer spurring his horse onto freedom! ;) (I liked this pic)
I think this looks like something out of a Wells Fargo commercial.
Murr.
General Custer and his proud steed.
I like this. :) CHARGE! (Which is what we did to our credit cards in order to buy our dresses!:))
I went into my room in search of my shoes and unaware of the beauty that awaited me. I put on my coat, scarf, and gloves, and went back into the hallway. As we walked to the polo fields, we laughed, joked, and just generally enjoyed each others' company. It was cold out, so we walked a little bit faster than normal and rubbed our noses a little bit more.
As we neared the Memorial, the silence began to descend around us and we followed suit. I fell into step next to Payne as we neared the actual entrance, and Janet and I half-smiled at each other. We stood near the Poem Wall as I call it just inside the entrance for a little while, and then began walking down the softly lit path toward the main part.
The only sound to be heard now was the crunch of feet on gravel, and in the stillness the sound was deafening. It took what seemed like hours to traverse this cold and dimly lit path. Reaching the sphere of memorial stands, Payne motioned he would follow me and we started to circle around to the other side. When we found a good place to stop, we all lined up side-by-side. Nick, me, Payne, Janet, Monica, Shannon. Like little chess pieces in an ever-changing game we stood there, swaying a little, staring blankly ahead like so many dolls on a shelf.
I couldn't think. My head wasn't in the game. I saw all around me people already starting to tear up, to shudder violently, to give way to the stream of tears and pain. I felt nothing. Who were these people that I had never met? I didn't even know their names. Why should I care? Yes, it was a horrible tragedy, but one that happened 6 years ago. SIX YEARS! I had nothing in common with these people.
Then suddenly people started walking towards Center Pole, carrying candles. Mothers, Fathers, Brothers and Sisters- the families of the dead were walking into the middle of the memorial. They set their candles down and began to move back toward their respective portals. The students began filing onto the center grass. Numb from the cold, I followed. After a roll call, we sang Amazing Grace and the Spirit of Aggieland. After that, the hundreds of adults and students stood in that freezing grass circle for an eternity. As people slowly began leaving, I began looking around me. There were corps units with locked arms and blank stares, grieving friends, and clueless freshmen. I turned to Janet and found her with her face buried in Payne's chest, him gently stroking her hair as she cried a little.
I wondered why they all cared. Surely not all of these people knew someone who died, did they? But then I thought, what if it doesn't MATTER if I knew them or not? What if all that matters is that I'm a part of something bigger than myself, a part of something that can't be explained to those who aren't a part of it? These people were just that- people. People with the same feelings, needs, and failings as me. People who needed to feel like they belonged somewhere, and found that "somewhere" to be Aggieland.
When we finally started to walk away, after the crowd had greatly dispersed, I couldn't help noticing again those candles. Just 12 little candles, out there in the middle of such a huge space, and yet shining their light for all those around to see. As I walked I kept looking back and pausing, mesmerized by those candles, thinking. Those little candles making an impact on their world, no matter how small. Little candles, and although their lights might be extinguished, still they remained, if only in the memory of those who witnessed their light.
And as I walked away from those candles, as I was able to see less and less of their light, I found myself thinking, "God bless you and keep you and make His face to shine upon you." I wasn't sure who I was thinking that about, whether it was the families, the dead, or even the student body in general.
Walking away from that memorial, at 3:45ish this morning, I realized again what I have so many times been floored by this semester:
I love it here. I love Aggieland. And I will ALWAYS be an Aggie.
Gig 'Em, and I hope to see you there next year.|||113230918532757025|||"From the outside looking in you can't understand it, from the inside looking out you can't explain it."
This keyboard is making me angry. The space key doesn't want to work.
So I know it's been a while since I've actually SAID anything on here, but I haven't felt like I've had much to say. So in lieu of that, I'll post more "things" about myself (Hmm. Any stalkers out there?:))
1. My mother is and always will be my best friend.
2. I love working crosswords. My favorite days are Tuesday and Wednesday, because they're harder than Monday but easier than Thursday or Friday. I like to be able to finish it.
3. I hate myself when I'm a lazy slacker. Like when I skip class.
4. I'm semi-apathetic academically. And by that I mean that I don't mind a slightly lower GPR if it means I get to have a social life. We'll find out come Christmas (grade time).
5. I love naps and all things sleeping-related. Like my pillow, my blankie, etc.
6. I've slept with my blankie all my life. My mother had to buy me a new one years ago because my original one wore out. Literally. Like big gaping holes.
7. Larry helped me buy my laptop. And by that I mean that I told him what I wanted and how much I could spend, and he made it happen. I think he has ties to the mafia. :)
8. My bed is my safe place. It's the one place I won't let other people be (at least in between the sheets). Shannon's brothers are staying with us for the t.u. game and they're sleeping in our room while we sleep across the hall, and it's going to be very hard for me. I'm still not sure if I'm okay with it. Is that dumb? :)
9. The girl sitting catty-corner across from me here in the SCC is staring at me and it's creeping me out.
10. Whenever I go to Sonic I usually get the very same thing every time-- a #5 Snack Size (Jumbo Popcorn Chicken), with tater tots instead of fries, two honey mustards, and a grape slush. I'm a creature of habit.
Well, that's all for today. Have a great one.|||113215945823297754|||More "Things".... :)
I don't feel like writing right now.
So I'll leave you with a pic I took this past summer. Murr.
PS- I'm starting to get kind of annoyed with my design (due to some random circumstances I can't change the background color and that annoys me). So I'm contemplating switching over to Xanga for a little while til Larry can show me how to fix it. :) Meh, it'll prolly never happen, but I'm just contemplating. ;)
